What recipe of yours would win an Oscar? What category would your recipe win.

My hashbrowns: Best Supporting Side Dish for a Main Dish Role.

I have written a lot of marshmallowy birthday posts about this child. This may be another one.

Twenty Things About Michelle

1. She scarred me. Literally. I show everyone evidence of this-the wild cat I took into my home, family and heart. (Note my other youngest child scratched me this morning-at about the same age-certainly with the same attitude) I show everyone this because no matter what, I can look at my arm and see her with me. I can remember both of us behaving badly. In other words, a poorly earned badge of honor.
2. She wants the combo breakfast. Eggs, bacon, pancakes/waffles. Do not make her choose one thing. That pretty much is true of Michelle in general…choices provide endless possibilities and she wants to try them all.
3. She doesn’t want to wait for people to finish eating. Watching people eat makes her ill. It is vaguely ironic that she works in restaurants and thus has to watch a lot of people eat each day. Really-sitting still is the problem. She needs something to do, to think about, to act on.
4. She has made me cry perhaps more than any other person on the planet other than my mother. No, she probably didn’t know that until just now. Yeah-she is powerful like that.
5. We can push each others buttons to the point of driving each other and other people to distraction. But, she knows I love her because she can, because I can and because we got to the point where we could and not end up with doors slammed.
6. She made me insanely angry exactly two years ago…teaching me a lesson about grand plans, teaching me to go with my gut and not with Denise rules when it comes to the right moment to give a gift.
7. She taught me that birth order does make a difference…even in a family with two youngest children
8. For years her sign of approaching menstruation was her wailing that she had no friends. Oddly enough, the now 14 yo has the same quirk.
9. There is perhaps no phrase that makes me angrier than “Well, Michelle isn’t really your child, is she? Isn’t she Denise’s child?”
10. She thinks me far more naive than I am…and always has…(oddly her older brother always seemed to think I was far LESS naive than I was) I let her think that, for both of our sakes.
11. Joseph is creeped out by being taller than she is now. For years, she was the big sister both age and size wise. He is uncomfortable that he towers over her now since she still towers over him in other ways.
12. Rebecca still has a healthy fear of waking Michelle up…born from too many years of Rebecca being THE LOUD ONE in the morning (and the early bird) and having the wrath of teen girl come upon her.
13. Elizabeth…the youngest of the youngest children has a conspiratorial bond with her big sister who is also a youngest child. I think they compare notes on making the most of their birth order.
14. My mother who didn’t meet Michelle in person until just a few months ago (and who seems to not remember nine years of my phone calls to her about my teenage girl) thinks that Michelle is sweet, polite and kind. Yes, Mama, she has grown to be well-behaved when life requires it. In fact she always has been…ok except that burping in public thing.
15. Her older sister and her shouldn’t be in the same room with their mother if they haven’t seen her for a while. I thought those two girls were evil together until I realized their mother was the catalyst around which they spun. Poor quiet Christopher in the middle of that. Of course, that got no better for Chris when adding me and the three little kids to the mix.
16. She has a compulsive need to talk me up when around her father and her father’s parents. I always walk out of those experiences feeling like mother of the year, Betty Crocker, and June Cleaver rolled into one.
17. She likes BLTs and people to cook for her. She likes a clean kitchen but not cleaning it. She is horrible at keeping bathrooms clean.
18. Cinderella.
19. She cares deeply about her mom, her grandmother, her older siblings and her younger ones. She spends a good deal of time trying to teach the younger children the right path. (even if it was the one she learned the hard way)
20. Today she is 20 and half my age…and yet, I think we both know that neither of us knows it all at this halfway point but she better know that I love her with a crazy fierce love that I never expected. Happy Birthday Baby Girl.

New Orleans on the other hand – I day dream about meals there. Debris sandwiches, Po Boys, beignets, red beans and rice, aspic from Commander’s Palace…I could go on. But one must eat a muffaletta in New Orleans even vegetarians and low calorie, low fat people. It makes for a lovely lunch. None made outside the parish can compare but you still can try. It makes for good football food too.

My Non Native But Makes My Family Happy Muffaletta

1 round loaf Italian bread (no, you won’t get this exactly right unless you are in New Orleans)
3/4 cup olive salad (might be found in your grocer-especially in Chicago area or gourmet grocer (poke around the tapenade area for something chunkier than a tapenade. If worse comes to worse use green olives in oil, some giardiniara, and garlic mixed together and call it good-or I suppose you could look for a recipe)
1/2 lb Genoa Salami
1/4 lb Capicola or Ham
1/4 lb Mortadella
1/2 lb Sliced Mozzarella
1/2 lb Provolone

Slice bread in half lengthwise. Brush bread with olive oil from olive salad. Layer the meats alternating with the cheeses. Add top side of bread. Press down. Cut into quarters or smaller wedges.

My family? Football fans? No. Not.AT.ALL.

It also caused my 16 yo to look at me and say in his saddest 16 yo boy voice “I really missed you this week Mommy.” Hmmm. This boy went to England for six months without a whimper before or as he came back.” Ok, why did you miss me?”  “Because I missed watching the State of the Union Address with you AND the Grammys!” No. He doesn’t care that much about politics and if the song has words-he generally hates it. What he missed and what my kids look forward to is that sense of occasion with major televised events.

When I got my older kids, the first Super Bowl together was bizarre. My partner has no interest in football. She knew I had no interest in football. She didn’t get the food thing yet. She certainly didn’t get my fascination with tradition and pageantry. I convinced her a few snacks were in order. She worked. Young teen girl deigned to watch with evil me. The younger three kids were in Katmandu or somewhere. Ok, the younger children haven’t actually been in Katmandu-as far as I remember.

The next year the scene repeated with kids bouncing in and out of the room. Denise trying to ignore my once-a-year football thing. And thus…Super Bowl Flamingo House Style. I have a set menu in mind. One must have dip, chips, and a retro appetizer or 10. If the kids are home-meatballs, and of course, R0-tel cheese dip. Dinner will be Super Bowl food. This doesn’t mean Denise doesn’t groan every year.

The Super Bowl TV time-loud…boisterous…except during you know-the important part-the commercials. Last year,  fun because I tweeted about various commercials and sometimes people that followed me were involved in creation and tweeted back. It made me into a temporary superstar.

In any case, TV time is rare and a special occasion in this house. Eating in front of the tv-even more rare. Creating traditions with kids “off-season” priceless.

I suspect 19 yo girl (less than 48 hours on that day from 20 yo girl)  on Super Bowl Sunday will realize she misses me, not just because I won’t be there for her birthday. She will miss me because I bring excitement and fun into something that normally she finds dull.

The younger kids find the actual Super Bowl dull I can hear 14 yo girl complain now…and see her wander to her room. Super Bowl becomes the mommy magic they remember as they grow. It won’t be the food. It won’t be the game. I can’t even tell you who played last year-even though I remember watching. It won’t even be the commercials. The family time-that makes the Super Bowl special.

I could say we watch the Super Bowl because we are Americans. Americans watch the Super Bowl on Super Bowl Sunday. I could talk about food, commercials, the clash of the best. I could say (and convince you) we become a part of something bigger than our family. That much true in its own way.  Truly though Flamingo House Super Bowl traditions celebrate the same thing but in a microcosm: competition zeal, undying love, humor, heartbreak, creativity, people who invest their lives in playing the same position. You remember, that greatest of competitive contact sports-the family.

A few weeks ago I was asked if I would mind if BlogHer syndicated it on their site. Of course I said yes…and now there it is…You can even see me on the front page of BlogHer if you rush over. Yes! Just like a real grown up CE! (but not-just a syndicated post)

So, if you missed it or want to give me some moral support-go over and comment Funeral Potatoes with Ham

In the meantime, tonight we are having pesto couscous stuffed portobello mushrooms for dinner.

I made a nifty mushroom sandwich on Friday night for dinner-I took the butter fried mushroom idea from the Mushroom Club, toasted some bread, added some muffalletta olive salad and an avocado to it.

Your corner sandwich shop doesn’t have these adorable retro beauties. You can’t beat them for thrifty, fun and tasty though!

Imagine fighting childhood obesity too-one sandwich for the whole family. Of course, if I tried to feed this to the whole family, my kids would choose no dinner. (One hates mayo, two not keen on eggs, three not fond of green pepper) That is quite all right-I find it the right size for a casual meal for the two of us.

Note the hot mayonnaise sauce is NOT spicey-but rather a cream cheese sauce with olives and pimento-adding a nice touch to this sandwich. Skip the spreading of mayo as you prepare if you plan to “pass the hot mayonnaise sauce” as suggested OR just make the hot mayo sauce and spread while assembling.

Egg and Green Pepper Family Club Sandwich

Remove the crusts from a day-old loaf of unsliced enriched or a specialty white bread. Cut in 3 lengthwise slices. Toast lightly under the broiler. Spread with mayonnaise. Place on a tray or platter. Arrange sliced green pepper on 1 slice. Cover with another slice of bread, then with a layer of hard-cooked eggs. Cover this with the remaining slice of bread. Top with seasoned sliced tomatoes. And here’s a tip–pass hot mayonnaise sauce.

Hot Mayonnaise Sauce

Combine 1/3 cup real mayonnaise, 1 (3 oz) package cream cheese and 3/4 cup milk. Beat with rotary beater until smooth. Add 1/3 cup each sliced olives and diced pimentos’ heat thoroughly in the top of a double boiler, stir occasionally.

I still like club sandwiches. My love does not…but I aim to convince her with…the MUSHROOM club sandwich! Yes! A mushroom club sandwich. Coarse cut butter fried mushrooms instead of the original chicken. I need to investigate the peppy mayo though. Because I live with an anti bacon person…I have to skip that too…making it a vegetarian dream sandwich. You know why? Because a little bit of olive makes a fine substitute for bacon when it comes to vegetarians.

I will start with the “Original” club sandwich and continue with the mushroom. Look at the photo though for the Turkey, Duck, Goose, Tongue, Roast Pork, Lobster, Salmon, Flounder Cheese, Boston, or Oyster Club sandwiches.

The Original Club Sandwich

3 slices toast
Butter or Margarine
Lettuce
Mayonnaise
2 slice cooked white chicken meat
2 crisp cooked bacon slices
2 slices tomato

Toast the bread and spread with butter or margarine.Cover one slice with chicken; spread with mayonnaise and top with a lettuce leaf. Place bacon and tomato slices on top. Cover with the remaining toast slice. Fasten securely with 4 wooden toothpicks. Cut the sandwich diagonally into 4 triangles. Stand them upright on a plate. Garnish with pickles, olives, or halved slices tomato.

Mushroom Club Sandwiches

Make according to directions for the original club sandwich; but use instead of chicke, a layer of coarse-chopped butter-fried fresh mushrooms. Add a little chopped scallion or minced olives and use “pepped up mayonnaise”

Better Cooking Library, Sandwich and Party Snack Cook Book, 1964

Anyhow, Chalet dip promises a hot and hearty dip to warm up chilly skiers. I can tell you it is a hot and easy dip or dinner if say you are on your own or just want to have a quiet easy romantic meal without the mess or fuss of real fondue. Candlelight, the two of you sharing a loaf of bread (oh who cares about the 1-inch cubes-tear it like heathens) Grab a piece of fruit or two. Let it go from there.

Or of course, you could pretend it is a fab Grammys or Super Bowl Party food. It is…I just got carried away thinking of my last “fondue” or fond of you night with my love.

Chalet Dip

1 5 oz jar Old English Pasteurized Process Cheese Spread, Sharp
1 5 oz jar Kraft Olive Pimento Pasteurized Neufchatel Cheese Spread
2 Tablespoons dry sherry
French Bread, cut in 1-inch cubes

Combine the two 5-oz jars with sherry; heat thoroughly over low heat, stirring occasionally. Serve warm with bread as dippers. 1 1/4 cups.

Sorry source buffs…that little ripped out piece of magazine has no dating information on it or even anything on the other side that would help me…just the pictures of the jars and I can’t positively id a year for that style.

You see…this is a completely wonderful dish to serve to company or to take to a friend with a new baby. Put it in a heart-shaped springform pan-you have a Valentine’s Day to remember.

It comes from a grocery store checkout cookbooklet I bought in the early 90s that is all pies. The cover is missing. No decent information on the publisher at all. I could make guesses based on the products pimped in it…but it is irrelevant really. It isn’t  retro but this recipe makes people swoon.

Please REALLY read all the directions first and as you go along. Otherwise you will end up with some missing egg whites or cheese or generally going “huh?”

Layered Pasta Ricotta Pie

Makes 6 to 8 servings ( I feel like it makes a bit more than that-but I tend to serve with sides)

1/4 (1lb package) Creamette Vermicelli (I tend to use about 1/2 of the package and you can use whatever brand you like)
1/3 cup finely chopped onion
4 cloves garlic, finely chopped
1 tablespoon olive or vegetable oil
1 cup grated fresh Romano cheese (Yes, I tend to use Parmesan)
3 eggs
1 15 or 16 oz container ricotta cheese
1 10 oz package frozen chopped spinach, thawed and well drained. (I mean it, WELL DRAINED. Press it once it is thawed.)
1/2 tsp salt
1 26 oz jar Classico Di Sicilia Ripe Olives and Mushrooms Pasta Sauce (or any chunky pasta sauce with olive and mushrooms)

Preheat oven to 350. Break vermicelli into thirds; cook according to package directions. Drain. Meanwhile, in large skillet, cook onion and garlic in oil until tender; remove from heat. Add cooked vermicelli, 1/2 cup Romano cheese and 1 egg; mix well. Press into well-greased 9-inch springform pan. Combine 2 egg yolks, ricotta, spinach, salt and remaining 1/2 cup Romano cheese. Spread over pasta layer. In small mixer bowl, beat 2 egg whites until stiff but not dry; fold into 1 1/2 cups pasta sauce. Pour over spinach mixture. Bake 50 to 60 minutes or until set; let stand 10 minutes. Heat remaining pasta sauce. Serve with pie. Garnish as desired. Refrigerate leftovers. This reheats well.

8 cups sugar, granulated
2 cups light corn syrup
2 cups hot water
1 teaspoon salt
8 egg whites, stiffly beaten
4 teaspoons vanilla extract (yes really)

In a large saucepan combine sugar, corn syrup, water and salt. Cook and stir until sugar dissolves and mixture comes to a boil. Cook to hard ball stage without stirring. Pour hot syrup very slowly over stiffly beaten egg whites, beating constantly at high speed with electric mixer for 5 min or so. Add vanilla and continue beating until mixture forms soft peaks and loses gloss. Drop by teaspoons on waxed paper. Swirl each candy to a peak.

But yesterday, I burned a quiche because our oven will broil but not light. The night before I was super sick and Denise picked up dinner at the Dominicks. The day before, that was kid day, commissary day and sub night. The day before Pizza night. The day before um I don’t remember OHHHHHHHH Pasta bar night. I wrote about that over on the Blogher Loving Food and Sharing Recipes Group.

Other craziness going on but that is the sum of it.

Tonight, update on the cholesterol effort: I made steamed broccoli and cauliflower and a mix of brown rice and white rice in the rice steamer I got for Christmas. I grilled tofu (for the first time!) on the indoor grill. It was pretty tasty (especially with that Fiesta Lime Mrs Dash I got at the commissary-who knew there was such yumminess in the no salt section?).

Yes, I have eaten a hamburger happy meal twice in the past four days. (Woo hoo Eleanor the Chippette and “It’s so beautiful” adds a new level to my ability to annoy my family.) But I have also eaten some pretty healthy foods.

My (now ex) husband was away at the same conference he is at on this very day. (I know this because I had kids on a Monday not a Tuesday night for dinner this week.) I spent that day trying to track him down-not as easy as it would be today when a text would have him in moments. I wrangled an infant and a toddler through Sears to find an outfit to wear to the funeral. That seemed better than reflecting on the fact that the night before I had seen a tv sit-com/dramedy type of show about the space program that he would love the night before at 1 am while I tried to fall asleep. I didn’t brood on the fact that I wasn’t sure how we could get plane tickets home. We were broke. Really broke…but I land on my feet. I always do.

But Mondays and Januaries are all about new starts and new goals and beginnings. This year I have once again bought myself time-you see-my cholesterol has been high since oh let’s just say-the first time it was brought to my attention-the 16 yo was just over 1. Bits, pieces and begs have bought me time without meds. I don’t know why but cholesterol meds scare the hell out of me. Yeah, I will swallow a horrid dose of immune suppression medication without a qualm, but cholesterol meds-I will just exercise and eat better. And while my number has never been the horrific 500+ it was when I had a one year old again. It has hovered around 200 for years though. Each year I sweet talk a doctor into extenuating circumstances and they give me a year. This year-my check up was in December-months late. (busy you know) I got a not-so-sweet January email saying meds. In tiny print it seemed (though actually the same type as the rest of the email) there was a caveat “are you really going to get serious about diet and exercise?” I really want to put you on this med today because of your history. I waffled for a week. Wedding! Vacation. Waffle House!

I replied today. Give me three months. I am going to be serious. It isn’t the meat really! It is the cheese. I left out the part where my mother sent 50 lbs of cheese for Christmas. My triglycerides were great and so was my “good cholesterol.” Still my total cholesterol was a nasty 240.

So, I will be tweaking recipes to be lower cholesterol and exercising more. I have three months. Wish me luck.

Anyhow-I do intend on a lot of things this year. Santa didn’t bring me a scanner so I will have to work toward meeting a more scans of cool old recipes goal.

He didn’t bring me a blog redesign either-but I do intend on getting that done by Sock Day. This blog needs to enter the new age of web design. Really. The slow loading and rotting ie look and not much better firefox look-pathetic.

I do intend on posting more recipes and more interesting family stuff. Y’all nag me about that will you?

I would like to share YOUR favorite old recipes and scans of them-so if you want to email them to me-go for it.

Anyhow, there is a handful of New Year’s Intentions. Add in exercise more and figure out the road to good health around this house and you have it made.

Soften 2 3 oz packages cream cheese. Add 1/2 cup crumbled blue cheese, 1/4 teaspoon garlic salt and a tablespoon milk. Blend. Mound in serving bowl. Sprinkle with parsley.

However, it is strangely yummy.

1 8-oz package corn-muffin mix
1 cup coarsely chopped salted peanuts
1/2 cup grated Parmesan cheese
1 teaspoon garlic salt
3 tablespoons butter or margarine

Prepare corn-muffin mix according to package directions; spread evenly in well-greased 15 1/2 x 10 x1 -inch jelly-roll pan (cookie sheet that has sides folks). Sprinkle with peanuts, cheese, and garlic salt. Drizzle butter over top. Bake in moderate oven (375) for about 25 minutes or till crisp and lightly browned. Immediately cut in squares. Cool slightly, remove from pan.

Better Homes and Gardens Holiday Cookbook 1959