December, 2011

  1. The Magic Room

    December 29, 2011 by Tarrant Figlio

    I recently read The Magic Room as part of the BlogHer Book club. I cringed when I saw the subtitle “A Story about the Love We Wish for Our Daughters.” just because I want a bigger love for my children than the stories told in this book. I want them to find love with someone else special which may or may not lead to marriage. That’s a given. My life would be incredibly lacking in many ways without the enriching and consuming love in my life.

    More than that, I want them to fall in love and love themselves-take care of themselves, honor their being, and be happy with who they are and who they are becoming each day.

    Then there is the book. We have been on one wedding dress shopping trip so far. It may be our only one. I’ve no idea whether the other children will get married. The whirlwind shopping experience involved one store and several dresses, but one had already been identified as “the dress” in our minds before she even tried it on. Indeed, it was the dress. No magic room. Not an amazing small business passed down through the family, just a chain store and a mass produced dress–but it was the right dress for her.

    Back to the book, first, I found the male father voice a bit vexing as the narrator. He made a lot of pronouncements as if they were true for all fathers and of all mothers. They weren’t. In fact, at points those things irritated me so much I wanted to toss the book aside.

    Then there were points where indeed I wanted to go and have a magical mother/daughter bonding trip to buy a dress to send my daughter into her future. There is a story there in my life of mothers and daughters and raising my daughters that might benefit from the ritual at least in my mind.

    I sorted that out, as I have done before, by reminding myself and one of my daughters that we can go buy a special dress and have a special party without it having to be a wedding. When the time is right and she feels ready–we don’t need a groom to have a ritual saying “this is my child, of whom I am most proud and blessed to have in my family. She’s now mature, ready to make adult choices and live an adult life. While bittersweet, this is a joyous time and celebration. Please surround her now with your joy, love, and blessings as she follows her life path.”

    Ritual and tradition is important in marking our life journeys. I truly believe in it.

    I believe there’s a story in everyone and it often comes to expression in these moments where a dress is bought, a love shone brightly, at least a love story of some sort. In the book, stories are told, of great mother/daughter relationships, of horrible ones, of tragic ones, of relationships with lovers, children, fathers, grandmothers and more. Those stories could have been more magic than the magic room itself. Unfortunately, the narrator left me wishing for more of the stories and less of his opinion, of the lens he put on the stories, which indeed was the only thing he could do, because love stories always are seen through your own lens.

    It did make me want to take a road trip to The Magic Room though. I will be looking for such a business if the time comes to buy a special dress.

    I was compensated for this BlogHer Book Club review but all opinions expressed are my own.

    Category BlogHer, Book Reviews | Tags: | No Comments

  2. Vegetarian Children Cropping Up All Over

    December 14, 2011 by Tarrant Figlio

    Last year about this time, I fretted about the vegan child coming for three weeks. Now we don’t have any vegan children. One child has become vegetarian and we have an adult child coming home for Christmas who has been vegetarian for years and years. The vegan has quit being vegan. This is good, because she has moved home for a bit.

    On the other hand, since moving to Illinois, we have fallen out of eating vegetarian in general. This bugs the girl child still at home that became vegetarian. It makes my carnivore child and mother happy.

    I am facing making some changes to every day dinners–not only temporarily since boy child plus girl child plus three “Yay! Vegetarian” family members outweighs vocal carnivore child and mother.

    So, I’ve been tracking what goes over well with the whole family and part of the family. I’ve also been thinking about ways to adapt favorites into vegetarian meals that won’t cause much fuss from the meat eaters.

    I also need to stick to a budget and what can be feasibly obtained this time of year in Illinois. This rules out a lot of fresh vegetables. The quality is middling, the price is high or both.

    The other thing that sort of surprised me was looking at what the family actually enjoys and eats. Pizza, pasta, salads, tacos, burritos and chili were all popular at one time. Now the round of approval for those has fallen (sometimes into “Why did I make this?”) Hmm–all well and good to make a healthy dinner, but not if no one eats. On the other hand, changing tastes have meant recipes I wouldn’t try in the past now shine.

    Sorting all of that out is the challenge I face this month. Healthy meals. Frugal meals. Meals that keep us from being short-order cooks and keep ravenous teens from raiding the kitchen after hours mean happier family and happier mom.

    Step 1 was identifying those things
    Step 2 is working in some new recipes and having the taste kitchen
    Step 3 is refining.

    In the meantime: Baked potato bar with Chili went over well (chili cheese baked potatoes–mutations for the non-chili eater and the various toppings for everyone.

    A cumin crusted tofu with corn/avocado/tomato salsa–very popular with 2 adults, one adult not happy with the corn tortillas, one adult not happy with the tofu–but she ate it anyway. Of course, avocados tripled in price before I could make it again for the younger set of kitchen lab rats.

    Category retro food | Tags: | 4 Comments

  3. December–More Than Holidays

    December 1, 2011 by Tarrant Figlio

    Food blogging (and magazines/newspapers/all media) runs on a cycle. It makes life easy in a way. I know that come summer, fresh produce, picnics, barbecue is on the way. The first hint of fall: tailgating, Halloween, fall food. Super Bowl recipes come faithfully every year. I realized though that something irks me and I am going to do something about it this month on this blog.

    From the weeks leading up to Thanksgiving through New Year’s–food blogs fill with cookies, pies, pumpkin, holiday side dishes, appetizers. It’s all lovely and fabulous–and I could post cookie recipes until your eyes bleed. The same with all of the other recipes “of the season.” Goodness knows, I own enough cookie/cooky/holiday cookbooks to blog one a day for an ENTIRE YEAR, possibly a decade.

    It rather misses the point though. You see, 330+ days of the year and at least double that number of meals, have absolutely nothing to do with the occasions in this time span. Yes, we can argue that we celebrate our love for friends, family, co-workers by creating magical gifts and meals from the kitchen around the holidays. Really though, that love is really shown in all those other meals. Those meals we don’t necessarily fuss over, those meals that keep our family nourished, the meal we drop at a friend’s home, a lunch shared at work, a lunch packed for our child show our love. I can pull it all out at Thanksgiving, at Christmas, New Year’s Eve and Day. Everyone will enjoy it. I enjoy the break from the ordinary. The children enjoy the extra baking. (some)

    In the end though, that smile on my love’s face when I make an effort to make dinner from what we have on a bad day, when the 21-year-old realizes there will be “real dinner” on a night when the whole crew isn’t here for dinner and does her little happy step and smile, when my mother says “that was a real treat” because I made a hot breakfast that wasn’t oatmeal, that is the real love in my kitchen.  Those unexpected (and expected) meals and snacks made without a fuss–that’s love. Holidays are sensory overload, show, and fun but not the same as the constant love that flows from my hands into the food I make for my family and friends. I get more “credit” for holiday meals and that can make them fun. In the end though, it’s the prayer that feel better tea will work its magic and wash away illness that matters. It is the dinner that my family knows will fill their bellies before bed and prepared with thoughts of love, of what they need, what they think, what weighs heavy on them that matters. Love in every day meals, nearly every meal of the year, that’s the love song and where I feel led this month.

    That means this month–this blog will be about those daily meals. The ones I use a recipe for, the ones I make from my head, the ones that serve to show the constancy of my love for all of them. (Yes, even on the days when I daydream about a chef, Seattle Sutton for a month, of never HAVING to make another meal, and the days when I say “can’t we just order?” the love is constant and is stirred in, even if it is just something pulled from the fridge or freezer.)  I choose to skip the cookies, cakes, side dishes, pies, and appetizers in blogging this month. If you need a recipe–there are tons in the archives. Enjoy them. We do. We will.

    In the meantime, while planning the whirlwind of food celebration, don’t forget the love that goes into your daily meals.

    Category retro food | Tags: | 1 Comment