Tuesday Confession

I have no fear of recipes. None. Recipes are like coding. You can read it and picture it in your head. You can follow it and get the result you expect–most of the time. If you don’t that’s a coding/recipe error or error on your part.

So, I can turn out beautiful sauces,Β  bake breads, create pastries, and make people swoon.

However, there are skills I don’t have in the kitchen.

1. I can’t brown ground beef. This means my family gets soy crumbles for everything that requires ground beef whether we are vegetarian or not. My ground beef browning generally ends up in funny chunks or burned in places. It just doesn’t work. I place part of the blame on lean ground beef. As a child, I wasn’t bad at browning ground beef. The rest of the blame lies in the fact that I find it easy to wander off while cooking and tend to forget about things on the stove top.

2. Rice. I can’t make rice stove top unless you count boil in bag rice. Fortunately, I now own a rice steamer. (Thanks to Steamy Kitchen for talking me into it via her book)

3. Knife skills. I think about taking a class from time to time. I am a lefty and have some motor skills issues, so it took a long time before I could successfully even minimally cut things as a child. My skills haven’t improved much. I can cut a chicken into pieces quite easily. Carving a turkey fine. Mincing/chopping/dicing/slicing–not my thing. I make do with a mandolin and handy chopper. Everything else I cut by hand looks mutilated.

What can’t you do in the kitchen?

Comments

  1. You also can’t clean as you go… just sayin…

    Someday I will teach you to ground beef.

  2. I can GRIND beef. I can’t brown it.

  3. What can’t I do in the kitchen? Just about anything besides get a beer out of the fridge or have sex. I love all of the wonderful cooks in my life because they fill me full of food that is full of love. Tasty tasty love.

  4. It sounds like you need a Slap Chop! And don’t you know that confessions are for Fridays? πŸ˜‰

  5. Crazy_Lady_me says:

    I cannot keep the place clean when I cook. Everything splatters & spills & oozes everywhere. To go along with that (’cause I’m pretty sure they’re related), I cannot do anything “gently”. If there’s risk of it “falling”, it will. There is no gentle in my cooking.

  6. LOL I obviously lost a word there…. BROWN ground beef. Duh.

  7. Katherine says:

    Gravy. It always turns out lumpy and tastes like flour, and it’s always my biggest anxiety at Thanksgiving. My mom is far from a great cook but that woman can make the best gravy. Neither she nor the “no fail” recipes have ever helped my efforts.

  8. What can’t I do in the kitchen? Can’t or Won’t? Wait, what’s a kitchen again?

    I love that Denie ratted on you about cleaning up…hee, hee. Hugs, Joy

  9. LOL, you just don’t have anyone to cook for any longer.

    Of course, she did. Cleaning is her job and really she wouldn’t have it any other way.

  10. Gravy? Hmmm. What kind of flour do you use? Do you brown it first and add the drippings slowly?

  11. Ha ha ha. Cleaning is NOT my thing either. The floor and pets and whatever I am wearing will also wear what I prepare.

  12. Nah, I like my handy chopper and that Cuisinart chopping thing I got from BlogHer food last year.

  13. I don’t believe you. I think you just DON’T cook because you have people to cook for you.

  14. Thank you for posting this! I feel a little less inadequate, now. At least I can brown ground beef… πŸ™‚

  15. Kim-
    I freely admit the things I rot at–it makes me irresistible.

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